UP WRITING?

Legalienate is responding to the requests of numerous readers who are sick, tired and disgusted with up talking? They have asked us to consider a neglected population of upwriters, as yet not acknowledged by mainstream America? Consider this our effort to support another minority suffering at being kept silent by uptalkers who dominate community space and leave no room for americans who are every bit as patriotic, loyal and dedicated to marketplace values but are angry at their neglect?

Have you noticed that even speakers of English as a second language now engage in uptalking? In foreign accents? Don’t you wish that they would also use the written word to communicate with up writing? And writing has no accent, so maybe if they get jobs as telemarketers they can text dialog and never be difficult if not impossible to understand?

Shouldn’t our ballots, tax forms and vital instructions include up writing for those who find it clearer and more concise than having declarative sentences sound like they are declaring something? Why shouldn’t we teach standard written English in our schools with the inclusion of up writing as an accepted form of written communication, however maddening it might be to many readers? As crazy making as listening to uptalking can be to legions of people whose voices do not rise at the end of every sentence? As if they were asking a question? Even when they are stating a fact?

It is long past time for the up writing minority to take its place among the growing number of minority identified groups that help keep us a divided and conquered population? They must be heard, even if in vocal silence with text? Insist that all candidates for president include up written political statements in their propaganda? In fact, demand that they shut the fuck up and just submit their lack of ideas with up writing?