Thinking they were getting fitbits to know how far they’d
walked, party faithful were instead equipped with Nit-Wit, the new app which
tells you how many times a day you’ve been a complete asshole.
Investigation is
ongoing to see if the mistake can be blamed on Trump or Putin but news that
international brain eating zombies plan to go on a crash diet by joining the
Democratic Party National Committee has gone viral with 250 billion hits in the
last twelve seconds.
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