Shaken by the gay community’s reaction to the recent firing of a gay worker, the Romney campaign announced the appointment of a special agent in charge of Life Style Choices. The appointee is a transvestite, HIV positive, transgender person legally married to a lesbian and a former director of Affirmative Action Office of Consumer Affairs.
“This campaign will be a friend to all Americans, no matter their choice of lifestyles , sex or profession, so long as they believe as we do in the free market under the control of our rich people” said Romney campaign spokesperson.
Romney immediately saw a rise of seven points in his popularity among transvestite, Hiv positive, transgender and legally married to lesbian Americans.
Not to be outdone, the Obama campaign was preparing an announcement that they would be hiring a Drag Queen Female Impersonator as director of their entertainment department. “Our campaign is prepared to bend over, backwards or forwards, to please every conceivable sector of our electorate. We will bow to no one or everyone, depending on financial contributions, in our desire to please every segment of the people, no matter how it wishes to be pleased “ said the campaign’s Director of Double Entendres , former hairdresser and football star Miss Toughie McThing.