Sunday, March 22, 2015

Latest Poll Results Show What U.S. Electorate Really Wants

An exhaustive review of nationwide polls sampling public opinion about U.S. politics and presidential candidates reveals that in 2016 Americans want bigger government, smaller government, no government, and an outbreak of lethal disease that "only affects politicians." Their ideal candidate is a seasoned veteran with fresh ideas who sticks to principles and knows how to compromise; someone untainted by corruption with proven ability to succeed at massive campaign fundraising, so they can "stick it to": (1) right-wing nutcases (2) lib-tards (3) Nader traitors (4) terrorist appeasers (5) illegal immigrants (6) the liberal media (7) the conservative media (8) Jews (9) Nazis (10) Jews who act like Nazis (11) Nazis who fund-raise like Jews (12) Woody Allen and Bill Cosby.

Ideologically, Americans favor less Pentagon spending, "as long as it doesn't help the terrorists," more spending on education, "as long as it doesn't help unions," less draconian criminal penalties, "as long as it doesn't help child molesters," more environmental protection, "as long as it doesn't increase regulation," greater support for working mothers, "as long as it doesn't expand welfare," and universal medical insurance, "as long as big government isn't involved."

1 comment:

Yih Lucy said...

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