McCain decries Obama's "inexperience," says America needs a "tough leader" who knows how to get shot out of the sky and be captured by the enemy. Obama agrees, promises to spend remaining months of campaign being tortured by Al Qaeda.
Tegucigalpa joins Bolivarian Alternative for the Americas. IMF condemns Venezuela for "meddling in the internal affairs" of Honduras, promises to cut off credit to any country questioning its "freedom and independence" under Washington's control.
Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez calls on Catholics to embrace socialism in the name of Christ. "'If you love me, feed my sheep'" calls for a life of sharing, not greed," insists Chavez. U.S. Embassy in Caracas expresses regret at Chavez's "mental problems," insists Sermon on the Mount is a blueprint for neo-liberalism. "Christ was the greatest advertising genius in history," said embassy spokesman Max Gaines. "He sold his salvation scheme to millions of people all over the world."
Kidnapping and sale of Guatemalan babies continues to soar. Wall Street praises the "magic of the marketplace" in reconciling supply and demand for the benefit of all.
Center for Science in the Jewish Interest announces that Palestinians have terrorist genes, calls for DNA cleansing in medical concentration camps. Euphoric Elie Wiesel hails new era of "anti-genocide."
Women for a Spineless Majority praise Oprah for praising Obama, shriek ecstatically at Illinois senator's genius for locating Democrats'"political G-spot."
No One Killed in Iraq Today, but Several Die of Old Age Waiting for Democrats' "New Ideas" To Materialize. "I've been waiting since Gary Hart," said 88 year-old Antonio Farkas of Mobile Alabama, moments before suffering a fatal brain hemmorrhage while listening to Obama intone the word "change" 93 times in four minutes.
Obama insists he is "ready to lead," vows to nuke Iran "in three seconds" if mullahs don't endorse Israel's right to run their country. McCain condemns three-second delay as "support for terrorism."
Congressman Tom Tancredo calls for border wall in Hispanic wombs. "With 45 million Hispanics in the country already, we have to stop more illegals before they get here," says the Colorado House member. Asked if such a policy wouldn't constitute genocide, Tancredo replied, "we have to preserve American culture and values."
Prison firm Wackenhut to begin building schools. Steven Cage, Wackenhut CEO, pronounces company's fortress-like designs ideal architecture for America's urban sinkholes. "Rather than send kids to jail when they're 18, we'll build the prison around them when they're five or six. It eliminates one process." Critics decry waste of young lives, urge company to change its name to "Wackenoff."
Gallup poll reveals 76% of Americans reject "handicapped," "crippled," and "differently abled" as labels for people with mental or physical injuries. 98% favor "differently crippled" label be applied to entire U.S. population. Government rejects term as "too accurate," offers tax cuts to people who stop thinking and watch more T.V.
Fecal contamination of U.S. currency traced to Treasury Department report revealing that toilet paper is more valuable than U.S. dollar. Toilet paper stock plunges. Wall Street sues government for unfair competition.
Mass apathy at corporately cloned candidates produces widespread hilarity at claim "this year's election is the most important in history." Organizers pronounce Vote Or Die campaign a bust, call for NRA to take over voter registration drive under new banner: "Vote, or else!" Mass apathy at ObaMcCaina continues.
Supreme Court rejects claim that apartheid public school system is result of "unintelligent design," insists "shit happens" sufficiently accounts for starkly racialized outcomes reminiscent of Jim Crow era.
Press reports that the fact that McCain denies having asserted that Obama's refusal to countenance having affirmed his previous denial of McCain's refutation of his original position on ingrown toenails among bisexual eskimos is evidence that "quality investigative journalism" is alive and well.
Saturday, August 30, 2008
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
CONVENTIONAL BULLETINS!
Dalai Lama, Bush, Congress, Brittany Spears, PETA and New York Yankees Vow Not to Watch Democratic Convention Until Democrats Stop Experimenting on Animals and End Genocide in Darfur, Iraq, Afghanistan , Georgia and all those other places.
TV Executives Sue Dalai Lama, Bush, Congress, Brittany Spears, PETA and San Francisco 49ers for Potential Defamation of Ratings.
Law Suit Replaces Yankees with 49ers because “San Francisco’s a smaller market ; we can’t afford to lose New York”
Biden’s Spellbinding Speech Begins
Democrats approach group orgasm after keynote address by Mrs. Obama. “ I loved when she said she loved America. It just made all of this worthwhile, you know?” said a Clinton delegate. “ This is what we’ve all been waiting for. We needed to hear that.”
All doubts about Michele Obama’s patriotism now having ended, Democrats feel victory in the air.
Biden Speech Continues
Mass rioting outside convention, mass partying inside, mass hysteria among pundits, mass confusion in Denver.
Biden Continues Speaking during breakfast, lunch and dinner breaks.
The Democratic Party Study group released a study indicating that hard working americans are having a hard time finding work to be hard at work at. “This seems to have something to do with the economy and the business cycle, which is currently in a bust mode, which usually precedes a boom mode, though the last bust was just before this bust, indicating that there is a trend towards busting the boom bust syndrome”, said the center director. “We will continue following this trend and report our further findings as soon as the check clears and the convention ends.”
Excited democrats pointed out that recent polls indicate the president has the lowest approval ratings of any president in history, but also show that a higher percentage of people have no idea who he is. “ Actually, i forgot his name. i thought the other guy was elected but i guess it’s still whatsisname?”
According to several party officials from the character assassination team, Senator McCain was alleged to have said he thought the Missile Screen around Poland was a new Polish joke, but he denied the charge and said he advocated more severe steps be taken against the Russian genocidal attack on the freedom loving innocent people of Ostentatia. “The ostentatious people need our support right now, not after Senator Obama takes office.” Corrected about his error, he said he would cancel his campaign in order to meet with president Sasquatch of Georgia - after his wife distributed beauty aids and foundation cream to Georgian women - to plan a counter attack . When asked where he would advise attacking, the senator said “ it’s one or two of those countries, check with my staff.”
When asked to comment on McCain’s comment, Senator Obama commented “ this is not a time when...uh...we should be divisive or...uh...rattling sabers...this is a time to come together as americans who cherish our god, our families and our freedoms and stand together as never before, with one voice and one viewpoint, that of working middle class multi racial gun owning god loving people united in getting our troops redeployed from Iraq to..uh...Afghanistan”
Biden fed intravenously, continues talking through speeches by Hillary, Bill, Barack, promises to finish before Shadrach Meshac and Appendigo arrive
Hillary repeatedly brings convention audience to its feet, electric shocks sited as cause by republican critics.
An anonymous delegate said “She was just so incredible. I never thought she’d endorse Obama. Weren’t you surprised that she didn't endorse McCain? This is so exciting and unexpected. What next? Who do you think will be nominated for president? Isn't this the most thrilling thing ever, or at least since American Idol? Last week?”
Obama’s acceptance speech brings mass orgasmic reaction
Grief counselors summoned for feminist supporters of Clinton
Obama throngs speak in tongues, freak out, weep tears of joy, experience multiple and repeated orgasms and generally Act Up. “ “This was the greatest speech since Christ’s sermon on the mount, or Marc Anthony’s defense of Caesar, or Bret Favre’s tearful retirement speech, the one last week. I’m so thrilled that i can hardly speak” said Marcel Marceau, one of numerous global supporters of renewed war in Afghanistan.
Biden continued speaking as the convention ended.
TV Executives Sue Dalai Lama, Bush, Congress, Brittany Spears, PETA and San Francisco 49ers for Potential Defamation of Ratings.
Law Suit Replaces Yankees with 49ers because “San Francisco’s a smaller market ; we can’t afford to lose New York”
Biden’s Spellbinding Speech Begins
Democrats approach group orgasm after keynote address by Mrs. Obama. “ I loved when she said she loved America. It just made all of this worthwhile, you know?” said a Clinton delegate. “ This is what we’ve all been waiting for. We needed to hear that.”
All doubts about Michele Obama’s patriotism now having ended, Democrats feel victory in the air.
Biden Speech Continues
Mass rioting outside convention, mass partying inside, mass hysteria among pundits, mass confusion in Denver.
Biden Continues Speaking during breakfast, lunch and dinner breaks.
The Democratic Party Study group released a study indicating that hard working americans are having a hard time finding work to be hard at work at. “This seems to have something to do with the economy and the business cycle, which is currently in a bust mode, which usually precedes a boom mode, though the last bust was just before this bust, indicating that there is a trend towards busting the boom bust syndrome”, said the center director. “We will continue following this trend and report our further findings as soon as the check clears and the convention ends.”
Excited democrats pointed out that recent polls indicate the president has the lowest approval ratings of any president in history, but also show that a higher percentage of people have no idea who he is. “ Actually, i forgot his name. i thought the other guy was elected but i guess it’s still whatsisname?”
According to several party officials from the character assassination team, Senator McCain was alleged to have said he thought the Missile Screen around Poland was a new Polish joke, but he denied the charge and said he advocated more severe steps be taken against the Russian genocidal attack on the freedom loving innocent people of Ostentatia. “The ostentatious people need our support right now, not after Senator Obama takes office.” Corrected about his error, he said he would cancel his campaign in order to meet with president Sasquatch of Georgia - after his wife distributed beauty aids and foundation cream to Georgian women - to plan a counter attack . When asked where he would advise attacking, the senator said “ it’s one or two of those countries, check with my staff.”
When asked to comment on McCain’s comment, Senator Obama commented “ this is not a time when...uh...we should be divisive or...uh...rattling sabers...this is a time to come together as americans who cherish our god, our families and our freedoms and stand together as never before, with one voice and one viewpoint, that of working middle class multi racial gun owning god loving people united in getting our troops redeployed from Iraq to..uh...Afghanistan”
Biden fed intravenously, continues talking through speeches by Hillary, Bill, Barack, promises to finish before Shadrach Meshac and Appendigo arrive
Hillary repeatedly brings convention audience to its feet, electric shocks sited as cause by republican critics.
An anonymous delegate said “She was just so incredible. I never thought she’d endorse Obama. Weren’t you surprised that she didn't endorse McCain? This is so exciting and unexpected. What next? Who do you think will be nominated for president? Isn't this the most thrilling thing ever, or at least since American Idol? Last week?”
Obama’s acceptance speech brings mass orgasmic reaction
Grief counselors summoned for feminist supporters of Clinton
Obama throngs speak in tongues, freak out, weep tears of joy, experience multiple and repeated orgasms and generally Act Up. “ “This was the greatest speech since Christ’s sermon on the mount, or Marc Anthony’s defense of Caesar, or Bret Favre’s tearful retirement speech, the one last week. I’m so thrilled that i can hardly speak” said Marcel Marceau, one of numerous global supporters of renewed war in Afghanistan.
Biden continued speaking as the convention ended.
America: Zionist Colony
“ The zionist power configuration’s primary loyalty is to the state of Israel and its policy is designed to colonize the US congress... to the benefit of the ‘mother country’, Israel ”
James Petras
Petras addresses a problem rarely discussed, except in whispers ; unquestioned support for Israel . He mentions congress, but the executive has also been “colonized”. Major party candidates, whether bowing before the American Israel lobby in Washington or praying before the Wailing Wall in Jerusalem, are evidence enough. The dominance of this “Zionist Power Configuration” is a very serious problem for Americans who remain generally unaware of its existence.
That power bloc has great control of government and media as well, and its political organizations bring enormous pressure on publications or individuals expressing criticism of Israel, quickly labeled anti -Semitism. If that criticism extends to questioning some aspects of the nazi persecution of jews, made even more horrible with constant repetition, they are labeled holocaust deniers. This heresy not only endangers individual freedoms, but the fate of nations , as the case of Ahmadinejad and Iran clearly shows.
America’s global position has establishment groups battling for control of foreign policy . Sectors of the old white anglo saxon protestant (WASP ) ruling class see dedication to the Jewish state endangering empire and are in a struggle with the newer Jewish power bloc. This clash of political mafias will hardly bring peace , but it has already brought out much about the previously unmentionable. Support for a colonial state that brutalizes its native population enough to shock survivors of South African apartheid can only continue with americans kept in complete ignorance.
Under a propaganda regime that depicts innocent Jews savageded by evil Palestinians, the U.S. massively finances and arms the Jewish state, while destroying other middle eastern countries on its behalf. Jewish persecution of Palestinians is somehow deemed acceptable because nazis persecuted jews. This illogical and morally degenerate policy has colonials settling where they believe they originated - with no evidence save mythology - and calling themselves semitic natives, while the semitic people who’ve lived there for centuries are expelled, made refugees , and called anti-semite terrorists when they resist.
This would be the ultimate black comedy if it were not so dangerous to all humanity. Israel is run by some seriously disturbed people ; we are not dealing with an individual nut case waving an ax, but with leaders of a state waving nuclear weapons - which nobody is supposed to know they have - and motivated by a cultural narrative which has it that everyone not jewish is ultimately dedicated to murdering everyone who is jewish .
A long history of suffering , both real and legendary , culminated in the dreadful nazi treatment of Jews in the 20th century, a terrible event that has become the fundamentalist holocaust religion. Its existential notion of pending doom has created a movement to destroy critics of any tenets of the faith. Such “thought crimes” can lead to social ostracism, professional failure and prison . For the zionists, the Jewish holocaust religion and the Jewish secular state are joined in necessity and meaning; one does not exist without the other, making it all the more difficult for reason, humanity or democracy to function when dealing with such contradictory fundamentalism .
The Zionist movement originating in a 19th century desire for a national jewish homeland has evolved into a belief that biblical mythology “proves” European jewish origins in Palestine. Religious freedom allows belief in any imaterialism we wish, even that the tooth fairy is responsible for modern dentistry. But when such mythology becomes the foundation for national policy, we are lowered to the mental status of primitive apes, but physically wielding nuclear weapons of mass destruction and not harmless war clubs.
How can americans tolerate this in the midst of a severe economic crisis and while carrying a colossal and growing debt which can never be paid? Only under mind management that convinces us all our problems originate outside America, and that Israel is our most important ally . An individual believing such nonsense would be judged insane and institutionalized. Our society is programed to treat delusions as real, lies as the truth, and psychotic behavior as evidence of mental health .
Once the Zionists achieved the destruction of Iraq their focus became Iran, with the most incredible claims fed to a public about that nation’s leader and policies. Ahmadinejad, having sinned against the holocaust religion by hosting a conference on that untouchable topic, has been transformed into a demonic monster who threatens Americans and Jews everywhere. He is called a nuclear madman who will exterminate Israel, based on a repeatedly twisted quote and oblivious of the facts of thousands of jews living quite well in Iran. But the zionist bloc brings us closer to war, writing belligerent legislation aimed at Iran and getting it rubber stamped by hundreds of its colony in the American, not Israeli, congress.
Tales of the Iranian threat stem from the same feverish source of psychotic fears and supernatural beliefs that transform Israel from a nightmare for Palestinians into a theme park for Jews . It is more vital then ever that we put a stop to this madness, but electing a new member of the colonized population to the presidency, whether in the USA or Palestine, will not make a substantial difference. Rather than minor change at the top , we need major democratic action by the whole population for a peaceful solution.
The colonization of American government will only end with creation of a real fifty state democracy in the U.S.A. , which could help bring about a real one state democracy in Palestine. Unfortunately, anything less will mean much more pain and suffering, possibly of epic proportions. And not only in Palestine, and not only for Jews.
Copyright (c) 2008 by Frank Scott. All rights reserved.
This text may be used and shared in accordance with the
fair-use provisions of U.S. copyright law, and it may be
archived and redistributed in electronic form, provided that
the author is notified and no fee is charged for access.
Archiving, redistribution, or republication of this text on
other terms, in any medium, requires the consent of the author
frank scott
email: frankscott@comcast.net
Frank Scott writes political commentary which appears in the Coastal Post, The Independent Monitor and on his shared blog at:
http://legalienate.blogspot.com
James Petras
Petras addresses a problem rarely discussed, except in whispers ; unquestioned support for Israel . He mentions congress, but the executive has also been “colonized”. Major party candidates, whether bowing before the American Israel lobby in Washington or praying before the Wailing Wall in Jerusalem, are evidence enough. The dominance of this “Zionist Power Configuration” is a very serious problem for Americans who remain generally unaware of its existence.
That power bloc has great control of government and media as well, and its political organizations bring enormous pressure on publications or individuals expressing criticism of Israel, quickly labeled anti -Semitism. If that criticism extends to questioning some aspects of the nazi persecution of jews, made even more horrible with constant repetition, they are labeled holocaust deniers. This heresy not only endangers individual freedoms, but the fate of nations , as the case of Ahmadinejad and Iran clearly shows.
America’s global position has establishment groups battling for control of foreign policy . Sectors of the old white anglo saxon protestant (WASP ) ruling class see dedication to the Jewish state endangering empire and are in a struggle with the newer Jewish power bloc. This clash of political mafias will hardly bring peace , but it has already brought out much about the previously unmentionable. Support for a colonial state that brutalizes its native population enough to shock survivors of South African apartheid can only continue with americans kept in complete ignorance.
Under a propaganda regime that depicts innocent Jews savageded by evil Palestinians, the U.S. massively finances and arms the Jewish state, while destroying other middle eastern countries on its behalf. Jewish persecution of Palestinians is somehow deemed acceptable because nazis persecuted jews. This illogical and morally degenerate policy has colonials settling where they believe they originated - with no evidence save mythology - and calling themselves semitic natives, while the semitic people who’ve lived there for centuries are expelled, made refugees , and called anti-semite terrorists when they resist.
This would be the ultimate black comedy if it were not so dangerous to all humanity. Israel is run by some seriously disturbed people ; we are not dealing with an individual nut case waving an ax, but with leaders of a state waving nuclear weapons - which nobody is supposed to know they have - and motivated by a cultural narrative which has it that everyone not jewish is ultimately dedicated to murdering everyone who is jewish .
A long history of suffering , both real and legendary , culminated in the dreadful nazi treatment of Jews in the 20th century, a terrible event that has become the fundamentalist holocaust religion. Its existential notion of pending doom has created a movement to destroy critics of any tenets of the faith. Such “thought crimes” can lead to social ostracism, professional failure and prison . For the zionists, the Jewish holocaust religion and the Jewish secular state are joined in necessity and meaning; one does not exist without the other, making it all the more difficult for reason, humanity or democracy to function when dealing with such contradictory fundamentalism .
The Zionist movement originating in a 19th century desire for a national jewish homeland has evolved into a belief that biblical mythology “proves” European jewish origins in Palestine. Religious freedom allows belief in any imaterialism we wish, even that the tooth fairy is responsible for modern dentistry. But when such mythology becomes the foundation for national policy, we are lowered to the mental status of primitive apes, but physically wielding nuclear weapons of mass destruction and not harmless war clubs.
How can americans tolerate this in the midst of a severe economic crisis and while carrying a colossal and growing debt which can never be paid? Only under mind management that convinces us all our problems originate outside America, and that Israel is our most important ally . An individual believing such nonsense would be judged insane and institutionalized. Our society is programed to treat delusions as real, lies as the truth, and psychotic behavior as evidence of mental health .
Once the Zionists achieved the destruction of Iraq their focus became Iran, with the most incredible claims fed to a public about that nation’s leader and policies. Ahmadinejad, having sinned against the holocaust religion by hosting a conference on that untouchable topic, has been transformed into a demonic monster who threatens Americans and Jews everywhere. He is called a nuclear madman who will exterminate Israel, based on a repeatedly twisted quote and oblivious of the facts of thousands of jews living quite well in Iran. But the zionist bloc brings us closer to war, writing belligerent legislation aimed at Iran and getting it rubber stamped by hundreds of its colony in the American, not Israeli, congress.
Tales of the Iranian threat stem from the same feverish source of psychotic fears and supernatural beliefs that transform Israel from a nightmare for Palestinians into a theme park for Jews . It is more vital then ever that we put a stop to this madness, but electing a new member of the colonized population to the presidency, whether in the USA or Palestine, will not make a substantial difference. Rather than minor change at the top , we need major democratic action by the whole population for a peaceful solution.
The colonization of American government will only end with creation of a real fifty state democracy in the U.S.A. , which could help bring about a real one state democracy in Palestine. Unfortunately, anything less will mean much more pain and suffering, possibly of epic proportions. And not only in Palestine, and not only for Jews.
Copyright (c) 2008 by Frank Scott. All rights reserved.
This text may be used and shared in accordance with the
fair-use provisions of U.S. copyright law, and it may be
archived and redistributed in electronic form, provided that
the author is notified and no fee is charged for access.
Archiving, redistribution, or republication of this text on
other terms, in any medium, requires the consent of the author
frank scott
email: frankscott@comcast.net
Frank Scott writes political commentary which appears in the Coastal Post, The Independent Monitor and on his shared blog at:
http://legalienate.blogspot.com
Friday, August 15, 2008
CAMPAIGN BULLETINS!
Obama Accused of Playing Race Card
McCain Retaliates With Joker
Pundits Claim Mixed Deal
Nation Folds
“Why does he have to act like he’s different? Why can’t he be like all the other white candidates in history?” said Senator John McCain . “We both have white mothers, so what’s the big deal? And furthermore I got a correspondence school masters degree in Ebonics while I was recovering from those nearly endless torture sessions in my Vietnamese Gulag, so he don’t be the only brutha in this race, know what ahm sayin”?
Karl Rove was asked to comment on McCain’s comment and he commented “ yo, whuss up wit datt? he be flip floppin steada hip hoppin? ”
The NAACP threatened a hate speech law suit against McCain and Rove but Obama urged against bringing race into the campaign.
“ This skinny kid with the light skin and the funny name, about to be changed in a way our white friends can believe in, need not stoop to the depths of the politics which have brought us all to a place in which we may never be able to live as a nation of one people, tearing down barriers that separate us and walls that divide us, except in Palestine, and extending the hand of white brotherhood, white sisterhood, white gay marriagehood and white neighborhood to one and all in order to say, Free at Last?Just Do It? Yes We Can!
Obama to Honor Irrational and Racist Fear of Islam
The Obama campaign is in process of creating a new middle name for the Senator, since Hussein seems to really disturb Islamophobes and other racists , while making members of AIPAC extremely uncomfortable. In the interest of creating a comfort zone for his Jewish supporters, early leads for a new middle name were :
Yitzak, Schmulka, Putzel, Schmendrich, Hymie and Schmuckler.
Jesse Jackson has advised against selecting Hymie .
He said “ I think Putzel or Schmuckler would work better.”
Countering the McCain campaign's use of celebrities like Brittany Spears and Paris Hilton in ads that implied Obama was simply a celebrity, the Obama Mind Massage Squad planned to introduce ads featuring the Three Stooges and Adam Sandler, implying that McCain was simply a moron. Advised that this could backfire, given that the the current president actually is a moron, a decision was made to stress physical and not mental differences, so long as they did not include race .
Obama Campaign Says Short Men Are Threat To Nation’s Future
McCain is short, Obama, in patriotic tradition, is tall. Pointing out that McCain - rhymes with insane! - is always photographed standing next to dwarfs, pygmies and twelve year old Secret service Agents, the Obama campaign will alert the nation to the danger of a short president.
“Never in our history have we been ruled by anything but tall men, and Obama is very tall, whereas McCain - rhymes with cocaine!- is very short and only made to appear tall enough, young enough and white enough to lead our country into the future”, said a tall campaign spokesman . “Look at the short guy in Russia and the other short guy in France. Do we want to wind up like them?
The McCain campaign immediately responded that Senator Obama - rhymes with Osama! - is actually endangering the nation’s future with his large ears, since a strong tail wind could blow him away and if that happened while he was president, then where would we be?
“People need to understand the real threat that Obama - rhymes with yo mama! - represents to all we hold dear on this earth, since he could take off at any moment and leave us to cope with things on our own. What kind of leadership would that be?” said a short campaign spokesperson, standing on a box in front of a group of preschool children .
McCain announces strong moves against Russia for Invading Georgia.
“My friends, we cannot stand by while our friends in Georgia are being murdered, genocided and ethnically cleansed by the Soviets, especially when they threaten Alabama and Mississippi as well, and if they get to Florida, our Cuban and Jewish friends will be in a terrible fix. We must take strong action now. I will not be drinking Vodka or eating sturgeon until the Soviets pull back!”
Advised of his geographic, historic and political mistakes and his ethnic paternalism concerning Cuban Americans and Jewish Americans, McCain said “ just kidding...this generation got soul...bom-bom-bom-bom-bom japan...heh heh heh”
Brett Favre tearfully retires from Jets, after tearfully retiring from Packers, and tearfully announces desire to be on McCain ticket as Vice Presidential candidate
McCain tearfully refuses Favre’s offer, says “he was the greatest fullback in history, but his running days are over.” Advised that Favre was a quarterback, McCain says “ I was never good with fractions. Only wimpy, light skinned kids with funny names were ever good with fractions.”
Ralph Nader and Cynthia McKinney expressed deep sadness that voters would be led to think these two were their only presidential choices.
McCain Retaliates With Joker
Pundits Claim Mixed Deal
Nation Folds
“Why does he have to act like he’s different? Why can’t he be like all the other white candidates in history?” said Senator John McCain . “We both have white mothers, so what’s the big deal? And furthermore I got a correspondence school masters degree in Ebonics while I was recovering from those nearly endless torture sessions in my Vietnamese Gulag, so he don’t be the only brutha in this race, know what ahm sayin”?
Karl Rove was asked to comment on McCain’s comment and he commented “ yo, whuss up wit datt? he be flip floppin steada hip hoppin? ”
The NAACP threatened a hate speech law suit against McCain and Rove but Obama urged against bringing race into the campaign.
“ This skinny kid with the light skin and the funny name, about to be changed in a way our white friends can believe in, need not stoop to the depths of the politics which have brought us all to a place in which we may never be able to live as a nation of one people, tearing down barriers that separate us and walls that divide us, except in Palestine, and extending the hand of white brotherhood, white sisterhood, white gay marriagehood and white neighborhood to one and all in order to say, Free at Last?Just Do It? Yes We Can!
Obama to Honor Irrational and Racist Fear of Islam
The Obama campaign is in process of creating a new middle name for the Senator, since Hussein seems to really disturb Islamophobes and other racists , while making members of AIPAC extremely uncomfortable. In the interest of creating a comfort zone for his Jewish supporters, early leads for a new middle name were :
Yitzak, Schmulka, Putzel, Schmendrich, Hymie and Schmuckler.
Jesse Jackson has advised against selecting Hymie .
He said “ I think Putzel or Schmuckler would work better.”
Countering the McCain campaign's use of celebrities like Brittany Spears and Paris Hilton in ads that implied Obama was simply a celebrity, the Obama Mind Massage Squad planned to introduce ads featuring the Three Stooges and Adam Sandler, implying that McCain was simply a moron. Advised that this could backfire, given that the the current president actually is a moron, a decision was made to stress physical and not mental differences, so long as they did not include race .
Obama Campaign Says Short Men Are Threat To Nation’s Future
McCain is short, Obama, in patriotic tradition, is tall. Pointing out that McCain - rhymes with insane! - is always photographed standing next to dwarfs, pygmies and twelve year old Secret service Agents, the Obama campaign will alert the nation to the danger of a short president.
“Never in our history have we been ruled by anything but tall men, and Obama is very tall, whereas McCain - rhymes with cocaine!- is very short and only made to appear tall enough, young enough and white enough to lead our country into the future”, said a tall campaign spokesman . “Look at the short guy in Russia and the other short guy in France. Do we want to wind up like them?
The McCain campaign immediately responded that Senator Obama - rhymes with Osama! - is actually endangering the nation’s future with his large ears, since a strong tail wind could blow him away and if that happened while he was president, then where would we be?
“People need to understand the real threat that Obama - rhymes with yo mama! - represents to all we hold dear on this earth, since he could take off at any moment and leave us to cope with things on our own. What kind of leadership would that be?” said a short campaign spokesperson, standing on a box in front of a group of preschool children .
McCain announces strong moves against Russia for Invading Georgia.
“My friends, we cannot stand by while our friends in Georgia are being murdered, genocided and ethnically cleansed by the Soviets, especially when they threaten Alabama and Mississippi as well, and if they get to Florida, our Cuban and Jewish friends will be in a terrible fix. We must take strong action now. I will not be drinking Vodka or eating sturgeon until the Soviets pull back!”
Advised of his geographic, historic and political mistakes and his ethnic paternalism concerning Cuban Americans and Jewish Americans, McCain said “ just kidding...this generation got soul...bom-bom-bom-bom-bom japan...heh heh heh”
Brett Favre tearfully retires from Jets, after tearfully retiring from Packers, and tearfully announces desire to be on McCain ticket as Vice Presidential candidate
McCain tearfully refuses Favre’s offer, says “he was the greatest fullback in history, but his running days are over.” Advised that Favre was a quarterback, McCain says “ I was never good with fractions. Only wimpy, light skinned kids with funny names were ever good with fractions.”
Ralph Nader and Cynthia McKinney expressed deep sadness that voters would be led to think these two were their only presidential choices.
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Zionism vs Democracy
“ the zionist power configuration’s primary loyalty is to the state of Israel and its policy is designed to colonize the US congress on behalf and to the benefit of the ‘mother country’, Israel”
James Petras
Petras speaks to a reality rarely discussed in circles accustomed to whispered criticism, at best, of the U.S. performance in support of Israel . He mentions congress, but the executive branch has been equally “colonized”. The scripted performances by major party presidential candidates , whether bowing before the Israel - American lobby in Washington or praying before the Wailing Wall in Jerusalem, are evidence enough. The dominance exercised by what he calls the Zionist Power Configuration is a very critical problem for a public that remains generally oblivious to its existence, let alone the control it has over our political system.
With a crippled economy and over extended armed forces, America’s global position has old establishment groups trying to retake control before mindless dedication to the Jewish state brings about total ruin . A revival of the old WASP (white anglo saxon protestant) power cabal finds it in a struggle with the newer jewish power bloc. This clash of establishment gangs will hardly bring social justice and peace to America, but it could give the public a chance to come to its senses. Support for a racist state that brutalizes its native population in a way that shocks veterans of apartheid South Africa can only continue with a public kept in the dark.
Under the dominance of propaganda that tells us innocent Israeli Jews are being persecuted by evil Palestinian -Arabs, the U.S. continues to prop up the Jewish state with money, and wage nation destroying wars on its behalf. Constantly retelling the story of past dreadful persecution makes it seem that because German nazis brutalized european jews, Israeli Ashkenazis are morally justified to brutalize Palestinian arabs. Settlers in a land which they believe, with no evidence save religious faith, is where they originated, are seen as natives, while the people who’ve lived there for centuries are expelled, treated as terrorists, and despite their Semitic origins, called anti-semites by those whose only connection to Semitism is their belief system.
This situation would be the ultimate black comedy, if it were not so dangerous to all humanity. Israel is run by some seriously disturbed people who are not waving an ax, but are armed with nuclear weapons. These, of course are respectfully never mentioned by what is called the international community, which means America, Israel and a handful of their lackey states.
How can the U.S.A. continue its multi-trillion dollar funding of support for Israel , the waging of endless war , and the maintenance of military bases in hundreds of foreign countries, while its people suffer a seriously declining economic status? Only with the help of a media that tells us our problems originate in far away places rather than at home, and that our most important ally in the world is Israel. Both are in complete denial of material reality. An individual acting on such presumptions would be judged clinically insane and institutionalized. Our society behaves as though delusions were reality, lies were the truth, and a psychotic condition was a sign of excellent mental health .
The U.S.A. is in hock for trillions of dollars and hated not only in the middle east , but increasingly in other parts of the world. This has led to calls for change which have seen the WASPs reasserting, to regain control from the power bloc that has played a major role in creating the present crisis, though not the unacknowledged longer standing one which is capitalism itself. That major threat to the future of humanity hardly depends on whether the ruling group is gentile or Jewish, but on whether we allow that system to destroy the entire planet, and not just the middle east.
The relation of policy and its reportage is clear in the preparing of Americans for a war with Iran, and then priming them into a maybe we will maybe we won’t indecision. Each time heated talk about Iran cools slightly, the price of gasoline declines. Until the next surge of fanatic babble that claims Iran will nuke Israel and exterminate all Jews, at which point the price goes up again.
These fluctuations in maniacal rhetoric and petroleum prices are part of the struggle to exercise control over U.S. policy in the middle east. The fact that Americans are not using as much gasoline has not escaped the awareness of petro-capital and it surely plays a role in the recent price decrease , which is still much higher than it was a year ago. The notion that oil powers provoked us into the war in Iraq is still widely believed, despite the fact that this would mean Big Oil decided to endanger its foreign relations and watch Americans consume less of its product. That ridiculous story is a measure of the extent of Jewish-Israeli power over not only the government, but the media which controls the consciousness of the American public.
Continued fables of an alleged Iranian threat , based on the same fictional evidence, supernatural fears and psychotic tendencies that transform Israel from a national nightmare for Palestinian Arabs into a Paradise Disneyland for Israeli Jews , make it more vital then ever to put a stop to this madness. Electing a new member of the colonized population to the presidency, whether in the USA or Palestine, will not make a substantial difference. Rather than a simple change at the top , which is part of the problem, we need a profound awakening to action by the mass population at the bottom, which could bring about the real solution:
A fifty state democracy in the U.S.A. , and a one state democracy in Palestine.
Copyright (c) 2008 by Frank Scott. All rights reserved.
This text may be used and shared in accordance with the
fair-use provisions of U.S. copyright law, and it may be
archived and redistributed in electronic form, provided that
the author is notified and no fee is charged for access.
Archiving, redistribution, or republication of this text on
other terms, in any medium, requires the consent of the author
frank scott
email: frankscott@comcast.net
James Petras
Petras speaks to a reality rarely discussed in circles accustomed to whispered criticism, at best, of the U.S. performance in support of Israel . He mentions congress, but the executive branch has been equally “colonized”. The scripted performances by major party presidential candidates , whether bowing before the Israel - American lobby in Washington or praying before the Wailing Wall in Jerusalem, are evidence enough. The dominance exercised by what he calls the Zionist Power Configuration is a very critical problem for a public that remains generally oblivious to its existence, let alone the control it has over our political system.
With a crippled economy and over extended armed forces, America’s global position has old establishment groups trying to retake control before mindless dedication to the Jewish state brings about total ruin . A revival of the old WASP (white anglo saxon protestant) power cabal finds it in a struggle with the newer jewish power bloc. This clash of establishment gangs will hardly bring social justice and peace to America, but it could give the public a chance to come to its senses. Support for a racist state that brutalizes its native population in a way that shocks veterans of apartheid South Africa can only continue with a public kept in the dark.
Under the dominance of propaganda that tells us innocent Israeli Jews are being persecuted by evil Palestinian -Arabs, the U.S. continues to prop up the Jewish state with money, and wage nation destroying wars on its behalf. Constantly retelling the story of past dreadful persecution makes it seem that because German nazis brutalized european jews, Israeli Ashkenazis are morally justified to brutalize Palestinian arabs. Settlers in a land which they believe, with no evidence save religious faith, is where they originated, are seen as natives, while the people who’ve lived there for centuries are expelled, treated as terrorists, and despite their Semitic origins, called anti-semites by those whose only connection to Semitism is their belief system.
This situation would be the ultimate black comedy, if it were not so dangerous to all humanity. Israel is run by some seriously disturbed people who are not waving an ax, but are armed with nuclear weapons. These, of course are respectfully never mentioned by what is called the international community, which means America, Israel and a handful of their lackey states.
How can the U.S.A. continue its multi-trillion dollar funding of support for Israel , the waging of endless war , and the maintenance of military bases in hundreds of foreign countries, while its people suffer a seriously declining economic status? Only with the help of a media that tells us our problems originate in far away places rather than at home, and that our most important ally in the world is Israel. Both are in complete denial of material reality. An individual acting on such presumptions would be judged clinically insane and institutionalized. Our society behaves as though delusions were reality, lies were the truth, and a psychotic condition was a sign of excellent mental health .
The U.S.A. is in hock for trillions of dollars and hated not only in the middle east , but increasingly in other parts of the world. This has led to calls for change which have seen the WASPs reasserting, to regain control from the power bloc that has played a major role in creating the present crisis, though not the unacknowledged longer standing one which is capitalism itself. That major threat to the future of humanity hardly depends on whether the ruling group is gentile or Jewish, but on whether we allow that system to destroy the entire planet, and not just the middle east.
The relation of policy and its reportage is clear in the preparing of Americans for a war with Iran, and then priming them into a maybe we will maybe we won’t indecision. Each time heated talk about Iran cools slightly, the price of gasoline declines. Until the next surge of fanatic babble that claims Iran will nuke Israel and exterminate all Jews, at which point the price goes up again.
These fluctuations in maniacal rhetoric and petroleum prices are part of the struggle to exercise control over U.S. policy in the middle east. The fact that Americans are not using as much gasoline has not escaped the awareness of petro-capital and it surely plays a role in the recent price decrease , which is still much higher than it was a year ago. The notion that oil powers provoked us into the war in Iraq is still widely believed, despite the fact that this would mean Big Oil decided to endanger its foreign relations and watch Americans consume less of its product. That ridiculous story is a measure of the extent of Jewish-Israeli power over not only the government, but the media which controls the consciousness of the American public.
Continued fables of an alleged Iranian threat , based on the same fictional evidence, supernatural fears and psychotic tendencies that transform Israel from a national nightmare for Palestinian Arabs into a Paradise Disneyland for Israeli Jews , make it more vital then ever to put a stop to this madness. Electing a new member of the colonized population to the presidency, whether in the USA or Palestine, will not make a substantial difference. Rather than a simple change at the top , which is part of the problem, we need a profound awakening to action by the mass population at the bottom, which could bring about the real solution:
A fifty state democracy in the U.S.A. , and a one state democracy in Palestine.
Copyright (c) 2008 by Frank Scott. All rights reserved.
This text may be used and shared in accordance with the
fair-use provisions of U.S. copyright law, and it may be
archived and redistributed in electronic form, provided that
the author is notified and no fee is charged for access.
Archiving, redistribution, or republication of this text on
other terms, in any medium, requires the consent of the author
frank scott
email: frankscott@comcast.net
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