Muslim Film Claims Jewish Threat

Muslim Film Outlines Jewish Threat to USA

“Don’t Eat That Pastrami”, a documentary financed by the International Islamic Conspiracy To Take Over The World And Forbid Eating Pork ( the notorious IICTTOTWAFEP) has been shown to New York City school teachers as an instructional aid to a healthy diet but is actually a threat to US-Israeli relations.

The film mentions control of the American government by Jews with dual citizenship and proposes that American interests are threatened by such anti-democratic means as involving the USA in wars against Islam that cost billions, kill thousands and alienate most of the world.

The two hour film, with ominous, eerie, sinister and menacing sound track music and countless images of Semitic looking bankers and merchants who are not Arabs also features a short lecture on why pork isn’t good for you, which fooled the Board of Education into approving its use in the school system.

Reels of the film were taken to Central Park and burned in a religious ceremony witnessed by the New York City council, the Mayor , members of Congregation Beth Midler and several squirrels, but authorities fear that DVD copies may be in the hands of New York cabdrivers who sympathize with the racist sentiments of the film. “It may already be too late” warned Holocaust survivor Fox Abeman.

New Environmental Threat: Political Gas Shortage

After the recent State of the Union address by the president and several debates among Republicans applying for his job, the EPA announced that national supplies of political gas were at record lows which threatened long periods of silent politicians from now through the election in November.

A poll found 99% of Americans strongly in support of the shortage , marking the first time an environmental crisis has enjoyed such one sided favor. “We need more crises like this” said a woman who wore a gas mask during the debates and the president’s speech but was now happy to go about breathing freely.

Joint Chiefs Pledge End To Policy Of Urinating On The Dead

Military leaders from all branches of the service expressed support for continued mass murders according to accepted civilized rules of war but promised that American military personnel would no longer be allowed to urinate on people after they had killed them.

“If some angry soldier pisses on an enemy while that enemy is still alive, that will be okay but we will not tolerate degrading the dead by such disrespectfulness” said Joint Chief spokesperson Admiral General  Flight Commander Hillary Eunice Chan von Santos.

Debt Limit Raised to 16.4 Trillion for Government And 1 Million for Individuals

Economic economists at the Economic Institute for Economic Recovery of the Economy hailed the increase. Nobel prize winning Director of the EIRE Dr. Wilhelm Shtuperman said “This will bring the economy back from the dead and enable consumers to shop until they drop before banks urinate on them.” Wall Street responded by laughing and introducing a new Derivative Hedge Borrowing Loaning fund scheme called The Madoff. Investors will be able to borrow money and then loan it to themselves in order to hedge against inflation by cashing in the loans from other borrowers before the borrowed money is due to be paid to the, um, original loaner of the borrowed money and anyway it will work with the new raised levels of debt so Shtuperman says just buy lots and lots of stuff with your new raised credit limit and charge it and don’t worry until the bubble bill comes due, which shouldn’t be for a while if the national debt can be raised to 20 trillion before the end of the year and we can get a bailout before the next war in Asia, Africa, Europe, South America or Outer Space.

Poll Finds Fox TV Viewers, Congress, Professional Athletes and University Professors Less Informed Than  Domestic Pets and Undomesticated Termites...details later

Obama Selects Bush As Running Mate

Return of “The Decider” Stuns Washington; GOP Presidential Debates Thrown Into Chaos

By Michael K. Smith
Special to Legalienate

RELATED HEADLINES

Bush Pick Hailed as "Pragmatic Master Stroke"

Outraged Biden Joins Tea Party, Threatens To Sue

Obama Lauds Bush Vow To “Follow the Cheney Tradition” as VP

Washington, January 27 - Barack Obama today named George W. Bush of Crawford, Texas as his running mate, the first ex-president selected to run for Vice President on a major party ticket. The president announced his historic step before an ebullient crowd of Blackwater mercenaries on the White House lawn. ''There's an electricity in the air, an excitement, a sense of new possibilities and of pride,'' Obama told a section of cheering snipers moments after disclosing the stunning development.

Calling for an end to partisan bitterness, Obama introduced Bush as “an exciting choice” and “clearly the best” for healing a divided nation. Bush thanked the president for continuing the family dynasty, and offered to formally adopt him into the Bush clan if he thought it would “help carry the South.”

Obama said the decision to choose the former president was a ''difficult'' one, but explained: ''GW has excelled in being bailed out, and this country certainly needs more of that!” He added that GW’s political return was ''really the fulfillment of a classic American tradition: to fail continually at everything and emerge triumphant anyway.''

Harvard Lawyer Obama Cites Constitution

''History speaks to us today,'' Obama told the Blackwater throng. ''Our founders said in the Constitution, 'We the people' - not just the identity politics focus groups, but all of us.''

''Our message,'' the president went on, ''is that America is a country of diversity where the spirit of conciliation overcomes all philosophical differences. As President Bush has said many times: ‘ politics stops at the water’s edge.’”

Bush, who was anointed president in 2000, has received the endorsements for the Vice Presidency of numerous Democratic Party organizations, including, On Our Knees, Inertia Unlimited, and Strength Through Servility.

Increase in Pragmatic Energy Seen

''He loves Israel, he's charismatic, he believes in God,'' enthused one adviser to Obama. ''We have broken the barrier. He will energize, not just southerners, but a lot of Republicans, which will make the Democratic Party more inclusive.''

Another adviser to Obama said that although Bush had engendered “unfortunate” bad publicity around foreign policy issues, he nevertheless would bring “new chemistry, new passion, and new understanding” to the ticket, especially of an often overlooked minority group: the rich. “People never seem to realize that as wealth concentrates in fewer and fewer hands, the wealthy become a smaller and smaller minority group,” said Obama campaign manager Marshall Cash.

In the last three weeks Obama interviewed seven prospective candidates and made it plain that he was seriously considering a break in precedent and selecting a candidate who “reflects our values,” rather than just another identity politics token.

Ranking aides to Obama indicated last week that Bush had outdistanced Biden in his personal interview with Obama, as well as in his press comments afterward. Some aides said Biden had proved somewhat disappointing, a comment that angered the outgoing vice-president, who is threatening to sue.

Factors in Choice Listed

What apparently swayed Obama, Democratic officials said, was Bush's experience in ramming through deeply unpopular policies, his considerable support among Blue Dog Democrats, and perhaps most important, his appeal to blue-collar superpatriots, coupled with his traditional “tough love” views, which seem to coincide with the president's.

Bush had emerged in recent weeks as the strong favorite among pragmatic liberals, typified by the vastly influential NAACR, the National Association for the Advancement of Crackpot Realism. But Democratic advisers to Obama said the decision in favor of Bush was based heavily on the notion that his political strength would enhance Obama’s support among the super-rich and religious fanatics. “They vote,” explained Obama at the announcement ceremony.

At the conclusion of the day's historic event, Obama and Bush clasped hands high overhead in the classic victory stance and called for world peace through the obliteration of Iran.

Ethnic Studies: Teaching Class Division

“Class consciousness is knowing which side of the fence you’re on.

Class analysis is knowing who is there with you.”

America has finally developed a movement for social change that seems conscious of political economic divisions that transcend race, sex or other very serious but sometimes overstressed problems. That movement offers the only solution to the inequality which grows more glaring and unjust. Calls for the 99% to take control from the 1% at the top of the financial pyramid are threatening to that ruling minority , its agents from the upper levels of the 99%, and the totally misinformed from the bottom. But those upper level agents represent the beneficiaries of divisive social policies that have brought personal gains for some, always at serious social costs to others. This is according to the dictates of profit and loss hardly free market capitalism. These agents often stand in strong support of socially divisive policies because those policies are good for “their” people. More often, those policies are good for “their” political and economic security.

Affirmative Action programs have enabled many previously shut out of the system to make progress and gain footholds within it, achieving professional, corporate and government positions that tend to make the upper strata look diverse, at least according to the limited definition that word has taken on in American culture. Almost always overlooked are the shortcomings of AA programs which have set groups and individuals farther apart when action of an affirmative nature for some creates, as should be expected, action of a negative nature for those on the other side of the ledger. A system which creates profits on one side must always create loss on the other; there can be no profit without loss, as eloquently explained to his clients by a former great hero of finance capitalism, Bernie Madoff. This basic structural truth of the system still escapes most because it is supposed to, having been taught out of reality by an education business that serves the production of individual consumers without social consciousness. This helps strengthen the competitive drive to personally consume while  gulling us into thinking as first person singular egos only identifying with groups when they are minorities, and thus powerless.

Though women and other minorities have benefited far more from them, the old criticism of AA programs when they were supposedly focused on so called blacks  still resonates:

Send one to Yale and send ten to jail.

While the college population of African Americans is considerably higher than it was before AA programs, the population of black Americans in prison has skyrocketed far beyond that. Note also that the new upper and middle class members are called African American – despite the fact that they have been native to the USA  far longer than many if not most European descended people who are no longer identified with hyphenated labels unless they adopt minority status and defensive postures  – while ghetto and project dwellers of the working and poorer class are still seen as “black”. Both labels are among many used to disguise commonality among humans. They all serve to keep the divisions within society strong, even to separate alleged members of the same group ethnicity by class. The programs originated to do exactly what they have done; maintain , protect and strengthen consumer private capitalism by rewarding a minority at the expense of the majority.

 We are presently seeing a struggle around Ethnic Studies programs at colleges and universities which relates to the same maintenance of minority power of the 1% over a divided 99%. 

What passes for academic diversity, cultural education and histories of subjugated and neglected people often turns out to  be branding labels for cultural and ethnic marketing. It has served to keep groups divided into sub categories in order to prevent them from ever threatening minority power of the 1% on top. Much neglected reality is confronted in Ethnic Studies courses, but the consumers of these studies are tracked into and out of programs as minorities, slated never to become anything more. By having previously unknown pains and joys of their groups preached to them they will hopefully strive to be just what their rulers want them to be:
happy, proud, diverse identity groups who support the status quo by believing they are different from everyone else who lives under the same regime but can acquire professional class status within it and thus help their families and communities. In other words, stay divided from fellow citizens not seen as members of their own ethnic, racial, sexual or intellectual groups and remain democratically powerless in a class, not ethnic society.

And so we have programs in the marketplace to reward some members of some groups at the expense of most members of most groups with supposed meritocracy strengthened by success achievers allowed to rise to the upper middle strata: affirmative action. And in academia, the teaching of American history in balkanized form, with various groups ghettoized into special studies that make them separate from – but equal to, in some warped return to past racist policies  – the great majority. 

Rather than teach American history as a subject in equal parts  concerning settlers, invasions, discoveries, exploration, land theft, slavery, fights for survival, massacres of indigenous people and more, these become special areas only studied in special classes aimed at special groups. Result?  Warped, balkanized views of American history, divided groups and sects among Americans, and a stronger control by the 1% ruling class and its agent servants of the upper levels of the 99%.

American groups identified as minorities by virtue of their not being direct descendants of Europeans have been tracked into patterns of discrimination no longer officially acceptable. But alleged social changes that only transform certain individual members of an ethnic or other identity group and leave larger populations still operating as second class citizens while being manipulated into showing pride in the fact that they are hyphenated and not whole Americans is hardly social progress.

Ethnic studies classes were introduced as a means to allow “out’ groups to learn “their” culture and soon become “in” by having increased knowledge, pride and general academic acceptance that could lead to further affirmation, as long as action continued along officially prescribed system enforcing lines. America’s professional class and upper middle strata has become a more diverse group in the look, sex and ethnic makeup of its component parts, but members of groups still identified as “minorities”  suffer many of the same injustices the ethnic studies classes teach them about, while instilling resentment to the society that commits the injustices and grossly mis-identifying the sources and power groups that profit from them. Which is exactly what they are supposed to do. 

Thus we have “racial” animosities growing as supposed “diversity” increases, and this along class lines that do nothing to increase community, social cohesiveness and solidarity among Americans, but simply create more division, individualism and hostility that maintains and expands animosity among the 99%.

While it is admirable to connect with sometimes ancestral cultures and often those merely a generation or two away, it can become a socially compulsive disorder to be forced into boxes of ethnic and alleged racial difference while a nation claims diversity and democracy as its credo, all the while infantilizing the first while making the second impossible. Electing a Chicano, or gay, or white, or black, or Asian, or Jewish member of congress, the city council or the presidency, can seem wonderful when reduced to minority consciousness. But from the standpoint of majority good, continuing the system of private profits accruing to ever smaller minorities at the expense of the great majority can only be seen as progress by  the  ignorant, the misinformed, or those who gather the profits; the 1%.

And their agents, however racially, sexually, ethnically or intellectually diverse they may think themselves.

MLK, Mayans and Another World

The celebration of MLK day hopefully reminded us that his dream of a better world involved not only racial justice but:

"the masterfully cooperative venture of persons in which they realize the solidarity of the human family by assuming responsibility for one another."

Hardly the  present dog eat dog reality which has many depressed souls interpreting a Mayan prophecy as a sign of the end of the world in 2012. But the ancients were probably foreseeing a beginning as well. They were not limited by the conjoined twins of western  civilization - individualism and capitalism - and so tended to see life as cooperative and cyclical, with beginnings and endings that continued beyond personal experience.

Present conditions are so bleak they could  be forecasting the end of civilization, especially from the dim view of either/or dualism. But a broader perspective might perceive a  giant step forward for humanity by our casting off shackles of ignorance that have imprisoned us for generations and the liberation of age old demands for freedom through real democracy, as opposed to the sham we have inherited.

Minority controlled politics is facing its end as people become aware of the dangers to nature and the lies that set a majority against itself. A world dominated by financial minorities which amass personal wealth at the expense of billions of humans cannot continue. But it won’t stop because of legendary prophecy or contemporary dreams. Without democratic action it wont take place at all. And given the sorry state of our global condition it’s easy to see environmental destruction and humanity‘s fraying bonds as signs of the end of life itself. That is what the 1% at the top puts into the minds of the 99% through its political and media servants: despair , defeatism and division among the majority that guarantees minority  control of almost everything. We need the opposite and it’s likely the Mayan, as well as other ancient prophecies, are  about visioning solidarity and success for humanity rather than division and failure, just as Martin Luther King.

The ravages of a perverse economy robbing the earth’s support system and an entire race to accumulate private profits for a small class is a problem calling for united material confrontation and not just faith in prophecy . But religious and social prophecy can help motivate that confrontation; it only impairs when controlled by shaman-agents of the 1% who manipulate parishioners into acting against their own interests.

In much of the world radical change is being violently resisted by minority dominators. Even without violent suppression, American elections in 2012 will accomplish nothing if the electorate continues accepting candidates bought and paid for by the 1% rulers. We may face the  Mayan prophecy seen as an ending. But a series of democracy demanding uprisings are signs of a beginning. Not yet enough to bring national democratic change, but that will come, and globally as well, if people stress cooperation that promotes the common good , true equality, and an end to the bloody wars that bring profits for the few and murder, debt and poverty for the many.

The next American election promises to be the most expensive and possibly most useless in recent history. With the exception of Ron Paul, a host of status quo zealots are poised to replace the most hopeless excuse for an agent of change the nation has ever seen. Of course , if change is simply a matter of identity politics, the USA is the most radical nation in the world. Its ruling parties and corporations are composed of women, people of color, people of no color, gays, lesbians, every hyphenated American sub-group known to the market and practitioners and prosecutors of hate speech, dumb speech and suppressed speech. The 1% have hired an affirmative action team to simultaneously screw itself, a majority of Americans, and large sectors of the global community, in order to wear the shiniest economic chains in the history of political economic slavery. Democracy?

What passes for liberalism has provoked balkanized divisiveness which has conservative fakers appealing to groups and ideals it has neglected: American workers , social values, political economics and more. Thus we have survival-of-the-fittest individualism stronger than ever because political forces work to divide the nation into controllable minorities and in the process keep them from becoming the democratic majority. Our elections involve agents of the 1% calling themselves Americans against agents of the 1% calling themselves hyphenated Americans and whichever side wins, America loses.

But people now see alternatives to divisive ego-capitalism and  the damaging aspects of class inequality. And that movement of minds is being transferred into a movement of bodies rising to demand the changes necessary for another kind of world to be born as the older one ends. And that old order threatens new bloodshed in Iran, Syria, Palestine, Venezuela, Bolivia and even Russia and China if the 1%, their agents and hired mercenaries have their way. The ancient Mayans could not have predicted the details of our plight and even MLK could not have foreseen what we face, but the threat to end all lives on the planet is real and has nothing to do with prophecy. If the people do not create another world, that old one could destroy us all. The spirit necessary to bring such change was articulated by Martin Luther King whose prophetic words inspired everyone demanding justice for black people in racist America, but they are even more important now to help end injustice, inequality and war for all of the human race. To close with his words, again:

"Now let us begin. Now let us rededicate ourselves to the long and bitter -- but beautiful -- struggle for a new world." 

1968: Memphis

Portrait of a Dangerous Man

The Reverend Martin Luther King preaches against the Vietnam War. He protests that twice as many blacks as whites are dying there, cannon fodder for an imperial adventure comparable to the Nazi crimes. The poisoning of water and land, the destruction of people and harvests are part of a plan of extermination. Of the million Vietnamese dead, says the preacher, the majority are children. The United States, he claims, is suffering from an infection of the soul; and any autopsy would show that the name of that infection is Vietnam.

Six years ago the FBI put this man in Section A of the Reserved List, among those dangerous individuals who must be watched and jailed in case of emergency. Since then the police hound him, spying on him day and night, threatening and provoking him.

Martin Luther King collapses on the balcony of a Memphis hotel. A bullet full in the face puts an end to this nuisance.

-----Eduardo Galeano, Memory of Fire, Vol. 3, Century of the Wind

Happy New Year: Down With Fuzzy Liberalism

Here in Marin County, California we are surrounded by affluent liberals who can't see the political forest for the trees. A case in point is John H. Howard, a self-described "retired international banker" whose New Year's Day editorial in the Marin Voice, "Occupy puts focus on disparities," is a classic of fuzzy liberal analysis and "we're all responsible" psychologizing.

Howard defines our central problem as income "disparity" between the 1% and the 99%, not the one percent's class power to make the rest of us work for them and vote for their ideas. On this crucial point, Howard assumes "inequalities" are the result of mismanagement, rather than systemic features of class hierarchy and centralized power.

Although the lopsided maldistribution of wealth has rarely, if ever, been worse than it is right now, the problem is not really income "disparity" but private control of social wealth, which is illegitimate in principle. For the relationship between plundering bankers and the rest of us is parasitic, not unequal, and we had best get that clear right from the start. Would we say that a fungus and the blighted potato on which it grows have an unequal relationship? Or does common sense compel us to conclude that the fungus simply prevents the potato from being healthy at all? Logic favors the latter conclusion, but liberals love to call for "balance" between insanity and reason, as though there could be such.

Here are more examples of fuzzy thinking from Howard's column.

1. More government oversight, not less, might have prevented the Great Recession.

But government financed by Wall Street has no interest in reigning in private capital, which will destroy any politician reckless enough to challenge it. The point is that speculation simply cannot be brought under control when finance capital owns the government and orchestrates capital flight from any region of the world that shows the slightest sign of populist revolt. Private control over public resources must be directly challenged and overcome, not fine-tuned with regulations that are routinely re-written or ignored when profit is at stake.

2. "I am not among the 1 percent . . . [but]I share the good fortune that has permitted the extreme wealth enjoyed by the 1 percent: High expectations from our parents, a solid education, and coming of age when employment prospects were favorable, a functioning democracy — the result is a fixed income from Social Security and two modest pensions, no debt, adequate government medical insurance, and a nice nest egg that allows a comfortable life style."

Old age pensions, the ideal of full-employment, universal education, and democratic politics are not gifts from capitalism of a more benign era, but rather, are the product of bitter class warfare over many generations, in which working people were routinely blacklisted, beaten, trampled, jailed, and killed by capital, in hopes that such social democratic features of modern life would never come to exist. Now that they do exist, liberals want to forget the bloody history that bequeathed them to us. But delusions of a benign capitalism can only lead us astray.

Social Security, for one, did not come from parental expectations, good education, better economic times, or the established political system. It is a watered down version of socialism's call for a guaranteed income for all. It came into being because of massive popular upheaval in protest against capitalism. FDR used popular indignation at capitalist exploitation to political advantage, but he remained steadfast in saying that he had saved capitalism for the wealthy few who dominated it (and who loathed him for helping usher in social democratic protections that kept the system from collapsing).

And just why were employment prospects "more favorable" a few decades ago? Wasn't it to a considerable extent because Washington and Wall Street felt themselves to be in competition with the Communist world for the loyalty of workers, so that wages and benefits were higher, unemployment lower, and unions far more common than they are today? Are liberals now prepared to praise Communism and unionization for their historic role in forging a middle class? If not, why not?

3. I agree with the 99 percent that the conditions that favored the 1 percent and me are no longer available for millions of Americans. . . .The Great Recession is partly to blame, but there are new barriers to success . . . the absolute corruption of politics by big money; the lack of political will to effectively regulate industry, especially finance; the absence of people of good will from the country's power structure; and most critically, our willingness to "let someone else do it" — fight our wars, pay our debts, raise our children, lend a hand down the street.

"Corruption" is something of a misnomer, since capitalism is designed to be "corrupt," i.e., to reward the highest bidder. Under capitalism, therefore, politics is not so much "corrupted" by big money as it is defined by it. Private centers of wealth inevitably translate into political power, and there is hardly a need for a quid pro quo between politician and financial donor for this to be the case. As long as massive accumulations of private wealth are allowed to exist, we will be beholden to them.

The "lack of political will to effectively regulate industry" correlates perfectly with the massive accumulations of capital that reward people handsomely for their moral indifference. And isn't it precisely the point of a profit-maximizing oligarchy to replace moral values with acquisitive values? So why should we expect "people of good will" to ascend to positions of power? In fact, we should expect the opposite.

As for "our willingness to 'let someone else do it' — fight our wars, pay our debts, raise our children, lend a hand down the street," wouldn't it make more sense to give us a moral leg to stand on before asking us to act morally? Is it really morally contemptible for parents to try to have their children sent to Stanford rather than Afghanistan? And is it our fault that corporate America prefers to enslave us with debt rather than give salary increases in a time of rising productivity? Finally, can parents really "raise their children properly," and "lend a hand down the street," when financial necessity routinely requires they be absent from the home 50-60 hours a week, and burdened with unfinished work when they are at home?

In any event, Howard's focus on "success" is the problem, not the solution. We need to think in terms of evolutionary success, not personal financial success. If we continue to define profit as the superordinate goal of social life, to which all else must be subordinated, the human species will soon cease to exist. Worldwide environmental crisis obviously cannot be solved by tinkering with market incentives. We need a new system, a real society, not just the cash-nexus of the marketplace.

4. Medicare is an entirely appropriate entitlement for all citizens, and its cost can be controlled through the some means testing, full implementation of health care reform, and newly vigilant oversight.

If it's truly an entitlement, i.e., something everyone gets, then it shouldn't be means tested. Means testing social insurance is the first step towards its abolition. And Obama's health care "reform" leaves the HMO profiteers in charge, unlike in every other industrial democracy, where they have been removed from medical systems so that human health, not private profit, can come first.

5. "We have lost the sense that we are all in this together, all riding the same planet, and that we as a society succeed or fail by what we do or don't do together."

There is plenty of this sentiment remaining in the U.S., especially in the Occupy movement. But people are beaten, gassed, and arrested for expressing it - at the behest of the 1%.

Source:

John H. Howard, "Occupy puts focus on disparities", Marin Voice, January 1, 2012