Duck, Cover, Upchuck

Duck, Cover, Upchuck


So the evil Iranians menaced our warships, and all just because those ships were sailing in their waters, thousands of miles from our own shores. Isn't it shocking? And the fact that our media repeated every word of the absolutely ridiculous and hilarious if it weren’t so dangerous story as though it was all true? Why that’s just our democratic freedom in action.

While AIPAC and the evangelical zionists in Washington were all pressing the panic button, millions of Americans had to be laughing if not crying at this patently absurd scare story, but our leadership either rattled word sabers or remained in stunned silence waiting for its orders. Was this a Comedy Central production, with idiotic dialog that might be expected during the writers strike?

Luckily, once again the fissures in our ruling class revealed themselves, as only one day after this science fiction story broke, another revelation was made even though millions knew it years ago: the famed Tonkin Gulf incident which got us into the Viet Nam war was a contrived nonevent. The president and congress, with only one outspoken dissent, rushed into a war that killed millions of Southeast Asians, more than fifty thousand Americans and tore the nation apart for years , for a fiendish lie foisted on the people by a disgraceful government and a willing and compliant media .

Could it happen again? Of course, given the gullibility of so many under the thought control of so few, but sectors of the ruling class who fear the current regime will destroy their system, rose to the occasion once again. That's the good news, the bad being that among our alleged representatives there was either collective silence or the usual rumblings of anti-Iranian bigotry and war talk. What’s a democratic nation to do?

Of course, the resounding laughter and snorts of disbelief from so many helped to bring more rational stories to the surface. Like, the whole thing was a fabrication, due to nervousness on the part of young sailors, or a production of the Iranian version of The Daily Show. And the timing, to coincide with our Doofus leader’s visit to our fifty first state, Israel? Just a coincidence, having nothing to do with Israel’s endless war against Islam, and especially Iran, seen as the center of threats to the Jewish apartheid settler state, now that Saddam’s Iraq is no more. But though the temptation to laugh hysterically is always there, these idiots in power cannot be dismissed easily, especially with the sorry lot of alleged opponents running for Corporate America’s top government service position: the presidency .

Listening to the pundit putzocrats shaping our consciousness on the next election won’t help much at all, given the paparazzi nature of their coverage and analysis. A public seemingly polled every fifteen minutes and with an attention span changing faster than their numbers can be dialed has already confused the witch doctors of media into beginning the ending of the beginning of one or another campaign deemed the hot pick of the week, then glorifying inane comments and pointless statements by any candidate who seems photogenic enough for page one highlights on the non news hour. After polls totally miscalculated one vote, a richly financed establishment favorite was said to have become the “comeback” candidate, and this after a grand total of two small turnouts of voters in two very small states totaling a tiny fractional percentile of the national population , and as tiny a fraction of their respective eligible voter populations. Wowee!

In this environment, an honest poll taken of everyone in the country would probably show that more than seventy percent weren’t even remotely concerned about the elections to come later this year, while a small group would be passionately involved, though not nearly as well informed about the candidates as they were about some celebrity's bout with divorce, drugs or sex. The best financed presidential wannabes said to be against the war all vote to fund it, and make weasel statements about ending the war in the right way, responsibly redeploying troops, or only leaving enough there to protect our bases. And these oily word meisters receive screaming support from a supporter base as desperate for hope as starving children for a crust of bread, thus reduced to accepting the intellectual garbage stuffed into their heads and even praying that they can mentally digest it and that all will turn out well when it is recycled at the toilet. Which seems to be where things are at the moment.

Ready to flush? Not all at once, please.